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  • Writer's pictureLayla

Setting Boundaries as a Form of Love

Updated: Jan 23, 2022

It’s because you love someone or something that you respect them enough to set a boundary.

This cultivates balance. Which creates actual healthy relationships with the things or people that you value.

This can be applied to food, people, experiences, etc. It’s tempting to become obsessed with the things that we enjoy or are enamored with. But when you truly love something, one of the ways that you show that love is through healthy boundaries.

When desire is involved, excess is tempting. But excess is often stressful on the energetic system. Discipline is required in order to stay healthy and energetically balanced.

On a spiritual level, your soul is deeply connected to every other life-form on the planet. However, on a physical/human level, you need to create structure — through boundaries — in order to exercise that love in a healthy way.

For instance, setting a communication boundary with someone who feels toxic or codependent is actually a form of love to that a person. You love yourself and the other person enough to allow time and space for healing.

Or, setting a portion boundary with your favorite dessert is a form of love towards yourself. You love yourself enough to enjoy delicious food, without going overboard and making yourself feel sick.

Remember, setting boundaries is not about being "right." It's out of a spiritual respect for yourself and others. Boundaries can be difficult to set. Vulnerability and courage are required to create and follow through with them.

Consider the following prior to setting a boundary:

  1. Do you feel taken advantage of?

  2. Are you spending an excessive amount of time on someone or something that is negatively impacting other areas of your life that are important to you?

  3. Does the situation at hand cause feelings of anxiety or overwhelm?

  4. Are you being forced to do something you don't feel good about?

After reflecting on these questions, bring the boundary back to yourself. Your heart, your needs, and your internal peace. Rather than trying to control another person, dig deeper into what you need.

Prior to setting any boundary, reflect on the spiritual lesson that your soul is offering from the situation first. This helps prevent you from setting falsely founded "ego boundaries" that further isolate you. Most of the time, the boundary we have to set is with ourselves. What we will allow or not allow into our lives.

Finally, just like the boundary line of the waves that roll onto the beach, boundaries will ebb, flow, and change over time. They are not black and white. Remember to continually return to your intuition and surrender to your the inherent wisdom & guidance communicated through your body.

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